I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize