Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
