Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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