I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
