): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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