All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
