apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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