after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
