Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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