Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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