Heybabeimwearingurpanties
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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