i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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