we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
