You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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