Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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