just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Damn victory sex feels great
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize