i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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