watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Randomize
