That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize