so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Are we still banned from the library?
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
