He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
