she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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