Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
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