Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
What did we do last night that was yellow?
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize