im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Randomize
