Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
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