Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize