Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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