your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
