OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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