no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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