I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
