i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
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