I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
