marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
