sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
