Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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