just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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