You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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