woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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