He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Randomize
