Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
