He is an equal opportunity slut.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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