Whatcha textin bout Willis?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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