He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Randomize
