Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Randomize
