I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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