I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize
