Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk