my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.