i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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